Reconciliation
Read Acts 15:36-16:5.
I have somewhere around 1,200 Facebook friends—not bragging, as there are people who have many more than I do, but I've also lived a lot of places and served four churches, so you accumulate a lot of "people you know" in those sorts of circumstances. And I am thankful for each one; Facebook has allowed me to stay in touch with friends from the past with whom I would have otherwise lost touch.
But I also have a long list of unfriendings. I'm not always sure why (though sometimes they let me know). There are several who have unfriended me and a few I've unfriended. I used to say that I'm probably not doing my job if I'm not unfriended at least once a week! But sometimes it's someone unexpected, and you don't know why, and it can be hurtful. Broken relationships continue to cause pain long after the break happens, and sometimes you never learn what caused the break.
I'm a big Paul fan, but in Acts 15, I don't think he made the right choice. Barnabas and Paul have been friends; were it not for Barnabas, it's questionable whether or not Paul would have been able to have the blessing of the Apostles. But in this passage, Paul and his mentor/friend Barnabas decide to set out on another missionary journey, and Barnabas (always the son of encouragement) wants to take along John Mark. The problem with this? John Mark abandoned them earlier (Acts 13:13), and for whatever reason, Paul is unwilling at this point to forgive him for that abandonment. I would imagine the conversation between them must have been very painful, hurtful. There seems to be a lack of repentance and forgiveness on both sides. I almost picture Paul and John Mark, refusing to look at each other, both with their arms folded, refusing to speak. And so Barnabas, son of encouragement, offers a compromise. He'll take John Mark, and Paul can take someone else. God uses even this relationship break to spread the kingdom, for now there are two missions instead of just one. But, based on the scant evidence Luke gives us, Paul was still in the wrong. We'll never know how God might have used a reconciled team of Paul, Barnabas and John Mark.
As a fascinating aside—Barnabas takes John Mark back to the place where he last ended his mission work, to Cyprus. From there, the two of them will start a new work. Barnabas gives John Mark the chance to recover, recoup and start again from the very place he deserted them.
Even though God used it, I still don't believe God desired or designed the breach between Paul and Barnabas and John Mark. The reconciling of relationships is still God's goal, though at times it is simply not possible. (And by reconciling I don't mean you place yourself again in a dangerous position. Forgiveness has more to do with our own spiritual health than with a return to "status quo" or normalized relations. For instance, a person can forgive someone who abused them without putting themselves back in a place where they can again be abused.)
So it seems that, at some point after this, forgiveness and reconciliation did take place between Paul and John Mark. In what is thought to be Paul's final letter, at a time when he is in prison and most likely facing a martyr's death, he writes to his young friend Timothy, a pastor in Ephesus now, and says this, "Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry" (2 Timothy 4:11). Assuming this is the same Mark who was not only Barnabas' traveling companion but also wrote the Gospel that bears his name, it is clear healing has taken place between them. Paul wants Mark with him in what he senses are his final hours.
Which leads us to the question: what relationship in your life needs to find healing? Where do you need to seek peace and reconciliation? Here's the bigger question: is there any better time than today to do so?
Another aside—it occurs to me there will be a huge need for this after this year's election. There are friendships being broken over political issues and candidates. My friends, we are better than this.
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| Paphos, Cyprus - 2014 |
But I also have a long list of unfriendings. I'm not always sure why (though sometimes they let me know). There are several who have unfriended me and a few I've unfriended. I used to say that I'm probably not doing my job if I'm not unfriended at least once a week! But sometimes it's someone unexpected, and you don't know why, and it can be hurtful. Broken relationships continue to cause pain long after the break happens, and sometimes you never learn what caused the break.
I'm a big Paul fan, but in Acts 15, I don't think he made the right choice. Barnabas and Paul have been friends; were it not for Barnabas, it's questionable whether or not Paul would have been able to have the blessing of the Apostles. But in this passage, Paul and his mentor/friend Barnabas decide to set out on another missionary journey, and Barnabas (always the son of encouragement) wants to take along John Mark. The problem with this? John Mark abandoned them earlier (Acts 13:13), and for whatever reason, Paul is unwilling at this point to forgive him for that abandonment. I would imagine the conversation between them must have been very painful, hurtful. There seems to be a lack of repentance and forgiveness on both sides. I almost picture Paul and John Mark, refusing to look at each other, both with their arms folded, refusing to speak. And so Barnabas, son of encouragement, offers a compromise. He'll take John Mark, and Paul can take someone else. God uses even this relationship break to spread the kingdom, for now there are two missions instead of just one. But, based on the scant evidence Luke gives us, Paul was still in the wrong. We'll never know how God might have used a reconciled team of Paul, Barnabas and John Mark.
As a fascinating aside—Barnabas takes John Mark back to the place where he last ended his mission work, to Cyprus. From there, the two of them will start a new work. Barnabas gives John Mark the chance to recover, recoup and start again from the very place he deserted them.
Even though God used it, I still don't believe God desired or designed the breach between Paul and Barnabas and John Mark. The reconciling of relationships is still God's goal, though at times it is simply not possible. (And by reconciling I don't mean you place yourself again in a dangerous position. Forgiveness has more to do with our own spiritual health than with a return to "status quo" or normalized relations. For instance, a person can forgive someone who abused them without putting themselves back in a place where they can again be abused.)
So it seems that, at some point after this, forgiveness and reconciliation did take place between Paul and John Mark. In what is thought to be Paul's final letter, at a time when he is in prison and most likely facing a martyr's death, he writes to his young friend Timothy, a pastor in Ephesus now, and says this, "Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry" (2 Timothy 4:11). Assuming this is the same Mark who was not only Barnabas' traveling companion but also wrote the Gospel that bears his name, it is clear healing has taken place between them. Paul wants Mark with him in what he senses are his final hours.
Which leads us to the question: what relationship in your life needs to find healing? Where do you need to seek peace and reconciliation? Here's the bigger question: is there any better time than today to do so?
Another aside—it occurs to me there will be a huge need for this after this year's election. There are friendships being broken over political issues and candidates. My friends, we are better than this.
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