The Most Popular Party
Everyone loves a good party, don't they? Food, fun, festive atmosphere, friends...and though, for introverts like me, parties are exhausting, there is also an emotional satisfaction that comes after having spent a worthwhile evening with good people. Everyone loves a party.
You may have parties for all sorts of reasons: birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, baptisms, confirmations, new jobs...on and on the list could go. But do you know what the most popular party tends to be?
You may have parties for all sorts of reasons: birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, baptisms, confirmations, new jobs...on and on the list could go. But do you know what the most popular party tends to be?
Yep, it's the pity party.
Well, okay, I don't know if it's actually the most popular party or not. I have no research to back that up. But it's an easy party to get invited to, especially since there tends to be a guest list of only one. We begin to believe that our circumstances are extraordinary, that there is too much on us, or that no one cares for us, and the woes begin. John Wesley saw that even in his day, which is why his sixth question is this:
That's why Jesus called us not to naval-gazing or to constant introspection (which is always a danger for introverts like me). He does, of course, expect us to monitor our own spiritual growth and take responsibility for it, but when we do that and only that, we end up in a place we ought not to be. Rather, Jesus called his disciples to serve. On the last night he was with them, on the eve of a day when it would have been easy for them to feel sorry for themselves, he gave them an example they were to follow: washing feet. "As I have done to you, do to others," he said.
I don't know that he literally wanted us to go around washing feet, though some traditions practice that. Rather, his call to his disciples, and to us, was to serve others, to get out beyond our own self and see the needs around us. Serving others is the one sure antidote to feeling sorry for ourselves or to justifying ourselves.
Several years ago, we had to take Rachel to Riley Children's Hospital for a relatively minor problem she was having, and to be honest, I was feeling sorry for myself. Not so much for her, but for myself, for a lot of reasons. All the way down to Indianapolis, I went back and forth between worried and mopey...even bordering on "what did I do to deserve this" thoughts. And then we walked into Riley, where during a break between tests we went down to the McDonald's in the hospital. There we saw all sorts of kids going through much worse things than we were going through with Rachel. God used that as a "smack upside the head" moment for me, and reminded me of a truth that I would hear put into words much later: the worst thing is never the last thing. As bad as you feel for your daughter, Dennis, things could be much worse. I can handle this; you concentrate on serving others, caring for those in great need, and let me change your heart. And he did. In McDonald's of all places.
The most popular party might be the pity party. But let's work on changing that, so that the most popular party becomes the serving party.
Well, okay, I don't know if it's actually the most popular party or not. I have no research to back that up. But it's an easy party to get invited to, especially since there tends to be a guest list of only one. We begin to believe that our circumstances are extraordinary, that there is too much on us, or that no one cares for us, and the woes begin. John Wesley saw that even in his day, which is why his sixth question is this:
Am I self-conscious, self-pitying, or self-justifying?All of those run together in one way or another. When we're paying too much attention to ourselves, we can easily begin to believe that everything is all about "me." That leads us to either feel sorry for ourselves, or to justify everything we do as "right," whether we consider other people's viewpoint or not.
That's why Jesus called us not to naval-gazing or to constant introspection (which is always a danger for introverts like me). He does, of course, expect us to monitor our own spiritual growth and take responsibility for it, but when we do that and only that, we end up in a place we ought not to be. Rather, Jesus called his disciples to serve. On the last night he was with them, on the eve of a day when it would have been easy for them to feel sorry for themselves, he gave them an example they were to follow: washing feet. "As I have done to you, do to others," he said.
I don't know that he literally wanted us to go around washing feet, though some traditions practice that. Rather, his call to his disciples, and to us, was to serve others, to get out beyond our own self and see the needs around us. Serving others is the one sure antidote to feeling sorry for ourselves or to justifying ourselves.
Several years ago, we had to take Rachel to Riley Children's Hospital for a relatively minor problem she was having, and to be honest, I was feeling sorry for myself. Not so much for her, but for myself, for a lot of reasons. All the way down to Indianapolis, I went back and forth between worried and mopey...even bordering on "what did I do to deserve this" thoughts. And then we walked into Riley, where during a break between tests we went down to the McDonald's in the hospital. There we saw all sorts of kids going through much worse things than we were going through with Rachel. God used that as a "smack upside the head" moment for me, and reminded me of a truth that I would hear put into words much later: the worst thing is never the last thing. As bad as you feel for your daughter, Dennis, things could be much worse. I can handle this; you concentrate on serving others, caring for those in great need, and let me change your heart. And he did. In McDonald's of all places.
The most popular party might be the pity party. But let's work on changing that, so that the most popular party becomes the serving party.
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