Family / Community

Economists worry about the disappearance or the shrinkage of the middle class. In the last few years, the disparity between the so-called "haves" and "have-nots" has become starker, and the gap has become bigger. In the economic world, this has to do, in large part, with access to information. Who has it and who doesn't? Who can leverage their access and who has none? That's the challenge of the internet-centered 21st century.

In "church-world," there is a similar disappearance happening. There are "large churches" and there are "small churches." There are fewer and fewer of what we might call "middle-sized churches." People who are "new" to "church-world" tend to want to visit a large church, where they hope to be anonymous. And, small churches, who have much to offer relationally, are often overlooked.

One of the places a gap doesn't exist, though, is in welcoming. The problems that exist with guests are not specific to big or small churches. In large churches, there's often the assumption that "someone else will greet them." And in small churches, there is the challenge of "breaking into the family." When I served in a rural setting, the biggest concern when we added a worship service was "losing the family feeling." When I was appointed to a larger setting (almost four times as large as that smaller setting) in a suburban community, the biggest ongoing concern was "losing the family feeling." Churches are churches, no matter where you go, and people are people.

What if we saw our church more as a community than as a family? One of the challenges of the family motif is that it's hard for new people to find a place, to be welcomed into a "family." We tend to do the "holy huddle," talking to our friends at church rather than welcoming new people. We tend to assume "everyone knows" certain things about the church: like where the restrooms are, who the speakers on the stage or in the chancel are, what the accepted norms are and how you get plugged into the church and into discipleship. These are Gospel issues, according to Thom Rainer, more than they are building or policy issues, because if we make no room in the "family" for newcomers, we fail in our mission to make disciples. If there is no room for them, they may never hear the good news about Jesus.

In a community, however, we understand that people are often moving in and moving out. The borders are more porous. We take on the mindset that not all of us will be alike. Community is a broader, more inclusive setting. Not everyone has to be alike. And, because of that, more people get a chance to see the beauty of Jesus.

There is an old song that says, "You're the only Jesus some may ever see." But it's also true that we might be the only barrier that stands between a person and Jesus. It's that important. It's that vital. It's that eternal. Is there room in the community for new people?